Tag: Chicago

The sounds of young expectation and a paranoid desperation, anxiety ridden, fear bitten, smitten with an infectious idea that the world’s meant for your satisfaction. “You’re special. You were born to do great things.” The great impression imprints on you forever and eventually you can’t remember if you read that on a postcard, a quote of the day on a Facebook page, or if your mother and father whispered swift encouragement in your ears after every fall from grace. Yet all the kids at schools had flaws except you. You believed it, cherished it, developed it, turned every ounce of your finite being into infinite potential. Apex. Apex. Apex. But the world’s opening up and your childhood days are gone, shoved out onto the lawn where you can no longer play. You don’t want to but you already miss it. You linger around the garage and the wind hits you and no longer do the walls shutter. Your chest inflates, cold air, exhale. Are you up to the challenge? The only way to meet the coming hardships is to face them with a confident determination, even if the spirit isn’t there. But you have no patience and all of a sudden, the skills you believed you were born with aren’t there. And it’s a false determination that fails at the first sign of criticism, that has underneath it a fragile yoke of a weak will that takes offensive at the slightest startle. The trials and tribulations of a man who’s been told “the world is yours” by parents, Scarface, Nas, but you’re just someone somewhere somehow shouting in a crowd of other people shouting. And you’re suddenly thrown into the hustle and bustle of the busy life, briefcase and clean briefs under pantsuits and dress shirts with ties and expectations, paranoid desperation, lego blocks and ticking clocks with times running out and the creeping fear and paranoia that you don’t really got what they bought you for.

And childhood is timeless because it echoes in nostalgia for an eternity in your adult soul.

This song is about a person who grows up believing he’s special, then goes out into the world and realizes he’s just as special as everyone else. That everyone is told the same thing. That the belief is a lie.

– AS